Itâs nice to have people around you who can get the information you need the most, but itâs a problem if youâre the one to feel awkward first. I looked up at the tall building with no end in sight thanks to the black sky, and then got up from the railing that I had leaned my hips against. 11:55 p.m. Drowsiness was creeping in. I drove early in the morning, stopped by a film company in the morning, and filmed at the studio in the afternoon. And I met Myungshin.
As I looked at the cars entering the building quietly in the wind for a long time, I lost my concentration due to fatigue. I decided to take an easier option when my eyes became puffy enough for me to think that I might have missed a car. There was no card to go through the main gate, but the underground parking lot was a bit poorly guarded.
Slowly hiding in the dark, I passed the guard, who was distracted by the TV, and went down to the underground parking lot. It was like a tunnel in which the curved and winding space continued endlessly. Perhaps it was because of the unique cold and smell of the basement, I felt like I was walking to a grave for a brief moment. But soon, cars filled the basement, and I stood for a while and looked around, then walked to the lobby.
As I pressed the number of floors in the elevator, I remembered the house of the madman I had visited before. Go straight to the left after getting off. Gray iron gate with black stripes below. As a courtesy, I rang the doorbell once, leaned against the gate and sat down with my knees bent. I took out my cell phone to check if there was a call, but there were no missed calls or texts.
I had already sent a phone call and a text saying, âAre you busy?â All I had to do was wait. I heard he wasnât going to Aliceâs Labyrinth for a while, but no matter how busy he was, he would go home and change his clothes. I thought so and closed my eyes. I repeated âI canât sleep deeplyâ to myself like casting a spell, but the tiredness of a long day weighed on my whole body as soon as I closed my eyes. The discomfort of the cold marble floor soon disappeared, and I fell asleep as if getting knocked out. And when I opened my eyes, startled by the faint sound, I couldnât help but be dazed for a moment.
Where am I?
I forcibly shut my eyes that couldnât open properly. One thing that came to mind was that the soft bed I was lying in wasnât the cold hallway I last closed my eyes in. I was startled by that fact and tried to get up, but something was pressing down on my chest. Uh? I could barely lift my head when I heard a whisper in my ear.
âItâs my phone.â
Phone? It was then that I realized that the noise that woke me up was the vibration of a phone. And the large body attached to me stood up in the dark. My eyes gradually adapted to the dim light of dawn, and I noticed the madman sitting next to me and answering the phone. He leaned his bare torso against the head of the bed and ran one hand across his hair. The hard muscles that had been strengthened through exercise were clearly visible even in the dimly lit field of vision.
âAlright.â
I tried to get up again, hearing his low voice. But he sensed me without even looking at me.
Plop.
He dropped my head on the soft pillow as he pushed my shoulders back.
âTell him to wait. I will go now.â
Thud.
The madman lightly tossed the phone on the table and pressed my shoulder and pushed me down. As usual, I turned to avoid him, but he quickly pressed his body against my lower body, immobilizing him. Then, with one arm on the bed, he raised his upper body and asked indifferently.
âDid you miss me?â
What nonsense are you talking about?
âWe saw each other the other day.â
I thought he might have been half-asleep, so I jogged his memories, but the guy only smiled out of courtesy. For some reason, I frowned as the laughter seemed to say âthatâs not the answerâ.
âDonât remember?â
âIt was so long ago, I canât remember.â
Do you think itâs still a dreamland? I wanted to let my doubts come out, but the guy looking down from above felt strangely intimidating. Tension spread through my body to respond lightly, and I slowly opened my mouth.
âWhy are you like this? There was no contact, so I waited at the door.â
âWhy did you wait?â
âI have something I want to ask you.â
âAnd?â
ââŚâ
âIs that all? Say it properly. Is that all?â
Now the coldness in his voice was clearly evident. As if suddenly waking up in bed is not enough, I have to be pressed down by a half-naked guy and questioned without knowing why. I pushed his arm around my shoulder and twisted my body to get away.
âIf not, what else would there be?â
I added harshly, pushing the motionless guy.
âFuck, this is why I donât do what I donât do. I waited for the first time in my life andâŚâ
Tussle.
My upper body, which he had pressed hard again on my shoulder, which was raised halfway, toppled over the bed. Shaking in the recoil, I looked up, wondering what was with those bewildered eyes. But it was strange. The vicious energy disappeared from the guyâs face. Instead, he mumbled dry with his softened eyes.
âFirst time, huh. Itâs just that thereâs a brake.â
âWhat brake?â
I retorted lowly because my anger had not yet resolved, but the atmosphere had completely changed and he smiled as usual.
âBut thereâs no brake at all down there, so donât worry.â
Upon hearing his words, I realized the guyâs hard object touching below, and a cold goosebumps went down. But, I intentionally looked straight ahead as if nothing was wrong.
âYou were going to leave.â
When I reminded him of the previous call, he raised one corner of his mouth.
âYeah, if I had known it would be like this, I should have woken up when I saw you in front of the door.â
ââŚâ
Then why didnât he wake me up? I was a little puzzled, but his hand was placed on my forehead. His hand brushing my bangs was so soft that I couldnât ask why. I didnât believe it, but now I feel like this touch was the answer.
âDonât.â
He sighed softly and took his hand. However, the guyâs eyes, recognizing my discomfort, filled with laughter.
âIt only sounds like youâre saying I shouldnât go.â
This madman⌠I murmured inwardly, and he put his hand back on top of my forehead.
âDo whatever you want.â
I wondered if my words were funny, the guy shook his shoulder for a moment and smiled, then asked.
âHave you met Song Myungshin?â
As I widened my eyes in surprise at the sudden change of topic, he stopped laughing and bowed his head and added.
âIâve been scouring all the computers to catch the insider who stole company secrets from yesterday.â
It was cold.
His lips touched the nape of my neck and sucked the flesh with a wet sound. I couldnât resist properly because I was listening to the words of the lips that opened above my neck.
âThe last phone call was that we had found a computer with evidence. Who do you think it is?â
A voice mixed with laughter tickled his skin with a hot tongue licking his throat. However, his body was not rigid in his actions. He must have already predicted his next answer.
âYour manager.â
He raised his head slightly and smiled at me.
âYour manager was the culprit.â
No. My manager was not the culprit. The answer that lingered in my mouth couldnât come out right away. His words made my head like a whirlwind, preventing me from opening my mouth. The subject of the whirlwind is Song Myungshin. And what he said lingered around mixed with anxiety.
âJust wait. Iâll get to you soon.â
How many hours has it been. If this was his work, he kept his promise remarkably well.
âNo.â
The madman slowly lifted his head at the denial that came out late. He licked his lips lightly, as if to recall some taste, and replied dryly.
âThere is solid evidence.â
âEvidence? It must be a computer. Thatâs all. Anyone can use it in my managerâs seat. Anyone in the same office knows that my manager has been down at XXX for a month and his seat is vacant. What idiot would do the obvious thing to leave evidence on his computer?â
âLook, the idiot is the culprit. Besides, your manager hasnât been at XXX for the whole month. He stopped by the office several times in the middle.â
ââŚâ
âAny other excuse?â
Waiting for an answer, he got up and went out of bed. As his face moved away and the hand on my shoulder disappeared, I slowly raised my upper body. As if to loosen his stiff body, he naturally shook his head from side to side and opened his mouth lightly as if nothing had happened.
âJust saying ânoâ is not enough. Even if it is obvious to the naked eye, the evidence has already come out.â
âYou have to find what is lacking. Evidence to turn things aroundâŚâ
âThen give it to me now.â
As I interrupted, he tilted his head to the side and looked down with indifferent eyes.
âI have to go to the office right now and discuss the handling of your manager. Even if your manager later turns out to be innocent, this industry is a place that feeds on rumors. False rumors spread quickly, but even when the truth is revealed afterward, people only remember the rumors that have spread widely. No matter how innocent your manager may be, itâs the same as being cut off because youâre useless to the company. ButâŚâ
The end of the sentence, which seemed to be boring, continued with laughter.
âYou believe your manager is innocent?â
âYes.â
âThe reason is?â
Because I believed that the real culprit was a different person. However, it was not enough to explain the words Myungshin said. It was just a feeling. I couldnât open my mouth at that thought, and then I suddenly realized that I was missing one thing. The question that the madman asked before saying that the companyâs criminal was caught.
âHave you met Song Myungshin?â
Why did he ask that? As I rose, he knelt down on his knees and stood up. The faint dawn light that came in had no effect on him as he turned his back to the window. I murmured, trying to look at him in the dark.
âWhy did you ask if I met Myungshin? Do you know something?â
There was no connection between what my manager was being accused of in that phone call and my meeting with Myungshin. Except for one thing, if it was a bizarre coincidence that he had the same doubts as me. The idea that the culprit, Myungshin, was provoked by me and framed the manager.
âI met Myungshin.â
I brought it up first.
âAs soon as we met, I said something to Myungshin, and Myungshin told me to look forward to something in a few hours. So when you asked if I knew who the culprit was, I was wondering just in case, if Myungshin schemed something up.â
I calmly told my story. He obviously knew something. If I was wrong, he would have stopped me and said no at once due to his personality. And I knew from experience that it was better to wait patiently than to get angry to get him to speak. But his silence was growing strangely long. Why? Was I missing something and misunderstood?
âDidnât you know something about Myungshin, thatâs why you asked me first? A suspicion that Myungshin created a trap after meeting with meâŚâ
âMyungshin, Myungshin.â
He muttered and pursed his lips.
âItâs very annoying.â
What was he saying now? While doubting my ears, he reached out to my face. Before I could dodge, his hand wrapped around my ear and neck.
âRevenge you say? But why are you calling his name like youâre close to him?â
â⌠What?â
Baffled, I didnât even try to brush off the guyâs hand that was gripping my neck. I had been seriously talking up to now, and what nonsense⌠But whatâs even more shocking was that the guy seemed actually annoyed.
âIf you keep doing that, Iâll misunderstand. I wondered if it is not just about revenge, but also lingering feelings.â
The thumb of his hand wrapped around my neck, moving slowly, caressing the flesh behind my ear. The action made me more breathless than I had been before. Perhaps it was because of the laughter mixed in the soothing tone. A low laughter with no joy at all, only a coolness.
âFor the person you used to fuck.â
â⌠Cut the bullshit.â
When I slapped his hand and retorted, surprisingly, his hand moved away.
âThereâs no way there would be any feelings left. If it wasnât for revenge, I donât care what kind of life he leads.â
I remembered the first time I met him in the elevator. I didnât really feel anything, and it was rather surprising. And I was now amazed at myself trying to explain this kindly.
âIf I had any lingering feelings, when I first saw him at work, I would have ran away because I didnât want to be found out that I was a shabby courier.â
If that was the case, I wouldnât have been able to meet my manager again in the elevator, and I wouldnât have overheard the conversation that I heard because I was curious about Myungshinâs change. Come to think of it, wasnât it funny? Even though he ran away with money it felt so empty. Thatâs why thereâs an opportunity to fill it with revenge.
âJust revenge, huh.â
I listened to the indifferent voice. His face was still obscured by darkness, but I could tell that the smile had disappeared.
âIs it really all about revenge?â
âWhat the hell are you talking aboutâŚâ
âThere is something wrong with your obsession with revenge.â
âI realized it when I was annoyed by the name of Myungshin,â he muttered to himself as he ran through his hair with his hand and turned to look at me.
âYou said that to Aliceâs boss. It was you who killed your brother and mother.â
âWhat about it?â
The response flowed surprisingly casually. Hearing my dry voice, he slightly raised his chin and looked down at me.
âIf you think that your brotherâs death is already your fault, isnât your obsession with Song Myungshin too much?â
ââŚâ
âTell me. You said all you want is revenge. Iâll give you that revenge right now. You can drop Song Myungshin directly into the abyss. He can lose everything he has and be thrown out on the street. Shall I do that? No, I really want to do that. So donât let that name come out of your mouth.â
â⌠No. Donât touch him.â
ââŚâ
âThe revenge is mine.â
At my words that sounded like a threat, he widened his lips. The sarcastic smile with the usual unsmiling eyes was like saying, âlook, youâre obsessed with it as I saidâ. There was no question, but a long silence seemed to persuade me to explain. Why was I obsessed with revenge? The killer was me. I didnât know if the actual time that had passed was as long as what I felt. But it really felt like a long time, when I opened my mouth and there was a dry feeling.
âI have to pay for my sins.â
I spoke at intervals.
âI have to pay for my sins. If I discovered one of the reasons that killed my brother five years ago, I canât just stay still. I have to deal with it. I will take care of all the rest of the garbage. There is no revenge for myself. Itâs just revenge for the time five years ago.â
I closed my eyes and remembered a bright red alleyway. A world where blood flew as if it was covered with red paint. That time. That time when I looked into the eyes of my brother who had been stabbed with a knife.
âSo donât interfere.â
Long after the last words without an intonation disappeared from the air, his hand came back to my face. This time, it covered the cheek, not the neck.
âHow interesting.â
He exhaled quietly and came over with one knee on the bed.
âMy heart moved.â
His eyes came closer and became clearer.
âYour voice sounded like a cry.â
It couldnât be. My voice right now was no different from usual. The words I was trying to refute disappeared in his next words.
âAnd it even sounds like youâre barely living to make the atonement.â
ââŚâ
âTell me. What are you going to do when you have done your revenge, no, your atonement?â
A sharp, cold voice approached me as if he knew my answer in advance. I didnât look away and let out a dry breath.
âI will answer you if you promise not to interfere with the revenge.â
âAh, I promise.â
To him who made a light promise, I gave him an easy answer.
âNothing.â
ââŚâ
âNothing. As long as Iâm alive, I canât pay for all my sins.â
It ends only when I die. He let go of his hand on the cheek, stepped back and got out of bed. And this time, it was my turn to be sarcastic.
âDid your irritation go away after listening to everything?â
âSure.â
Surprisingly, my spirit disappeared at the honest answer. No, the guyâs eyes in the dark in the illusion that he was looking at me with a frighteningly sharp gaze for a moment might have disappeared. As I frowned and thought that guy really didnât make sense, he stood up again, looking at the clock on the table and spoke quickly.
âThere were already two employees who I thought were the culprits. The reason I asked you if youâve met Song Myungshin is because I know that one of the employees is close to Song Myungshin.â
An employee close to Myungshin? I remembered the person who was talking to Myungshin in the underground parking lot for the first time.
âThe assumption that that person is the culprit isâŚâ
Realizing that the other person was not someone who would easily say things like that, I saved the end of my trailing words.
âDo you have anything to prove? That he was the culprit.â
âYes,â he nodded.
âAnd I wanted to make it easier to deal with him and Song Myungshin within a few days. But I met you and played a joke like this. Too bad itâs easy to deal with. Donât you think so?â
Asking that, he turned to the bathroom and raised one corner of his mouth.
âI just thought of something interesting.â
He turned his head to me and asked arrogantly.
âWant to hear?â
âSave it.â
I immediately refused and was about to leave the room, but his words caught me.
âThen your manager will be laid off from the company like this.â
I stopped and looked sharply at him, and he grinned with a dimple.
âOkay, Iâll just give you a hint because I donât want to disturb your atonement. Itâs important to turn this crisis around.â
âWhat is it?â
âOne of the other employees, who is presumed to be the culprit isâŚâ
He turned his half-turned body completely toward me. Yeah, I didnât know what would happen if I knew the other one. Find real evidence from him, persuade him or whatever.
âManager Cha Jungwoo.â
What, was that celebrity betrayed by his closest? I was speechless, but I heard the madman encouraging me.
âThink about it. But youâll have to think quickly. Song Myungshin is now at the company.â