Chapter 53

Editor: Re

Pr: TT

cw: brief graphic description of rape

As if it was a lie that he had stuff to do at work, the manager dropped me off and hurriedly turned the car around. Meanwhile, I really stopped by the company to find out something. When I went down to the basement, where I had been practicing acting for a month, the instructor who had just finished class recognized me and greeted me. When I asked him about the good-looking guy and the yellow haired guy, he gave me an answer similar to what I expected.

“Oh, I know he’s in the hospital right now.”

With a dark expression, he added with a tilt of his head.

“I heard that he was hospitalized two weeks ago, but judging from the fact that he has not been contacted yet…”

I asked him for his contact number and left. Hospitalized? I immediately called the number the instructor gave me.

Tri-ri. The dialing continued. In the end, a message came out saying that the phone could not be answered, but I didn’t care and continued calling several times. After trying for such a long time, I finally heard a low voice over the receiver.

[Hello.]

“This is Lee Taemin.”

[…]

“Do you remember what you said before?”

There was still no word from the other person, but I opened my mouth again.

“Changing your mind after 4 years and switching to men.”

A small breathing sound could be heard over the phone. Seeing how he reacted, it seemed like I was right.

“You said it was a difficult decision, so I hoped you didn’t change your mind. And then you said, since you entered this road painfully, you will not step out.”

[Stop…]

A trembling voice followed along with heavy breathing.

[Stop it. Why did you call me?]

“I was wondering if you changed your mind.”

[W- Why are you curious about that?]

Though not visible, I smiled at him, who was mildly angry.

“Don’t you remember? What else did I say when we had this conversation? I could help you only if you still had that heart.”

A whisper followed with the sound of breathing again.

[…help? how?]

“There is a way.”

Walking along the corridor leading to the lobby on the first floor of the company, pictures of the actors in the company could be seen. Myungshin, smiling brightly, stood in front of me and I gave the other person on the phone an answer.

“The way to get revenge.”

***

Contrary to expectations, when I opened the hospital room door, the good-looking guy’s appearance looked fine. From his visible face, neck and hands. However, it was difficult to stand, so he leaned half against the window sill. The single room, which was not spacious, had a bed, a TV, a small refrigerator, and a table. There were no clothes hanging on hangers, and there were no soda bottles or water cups on the table. It was as though he had been hospitalized a while ago.

“…Did you know?”

He greeted me with questions instead of greetings. The face that used to laugh leisurely turned pale and expressionless as if wearing a mask. I approached the wide window where he was standing and looked out. Outside the five-story high window was a narrow alley, and beyond it were full of old, cracked, low-rise buildings. It took a long time to get here by subway and having to walk for another 20 minutes. It took another 10 minutes to find a hospital between some house and a building.

The name of the hospital was overshadowed by its messy exterior and the elevator, which almost seemed to stop while going up, barely worked with a rattling sound. He was admitted to a hospital on the outskirts of Seoul where no one seemed to come. Knowing that I was looking around instead of answering, he made the first expression. It was a mocking laugh that twisted his lips.

“When I opened my eyes, I was here. I didn’t even know this place was Seoul until a few days ago. You… Do you know what happened to me?”

“What happened to you?”

“…”

I asked again slowly looking around the narrow hospital room.

“What happened to you?”

“Didn’t… you know everything?”

The confusion was mixed in, but he was still spouting spitefully.

“Or are you here to make fun of me? Fuck… You want to see me go through something like this?!”

Even though it was difficult, he forced himself to stand, and even stared at me. I was relieved when I confirmed with my eyes and ears that he had changed. This guy can be used.

“I don’t know the details of what happened to you. But I can guess.”

Confirming that the glaring gaze had softened, I let out a grave voice.

“I heard that Song Myungshin plays the role of a pimp who attracts aspiring actors and throws them in as playthings for his sponsor. So, what kind of toy are you being used as?”

I added slowly as I watched his eyes begin to tremble.

“Have you been tossed among men like dogs and raped? You struggled to escape, but was caught and said to be punished. What was stuck inside you? An alcohol bottle? A piece of lumber?”

“S- stop…”

“I think everyone would have been happy to see you crawling with a bottle behind you. if you beg for help, you’ll be beaten until you’re bruised. Of course, what was hit was the part that was covered by the clothes.”

“Stop!”

He staggered back, then looked away. His heart was pounding and his breathing was heavy.

“Don’t want to recall it?”

He turned his gaze away with resentment. ‘Are you asking because you don’t know that?’ The glaring gaze conveyed this, but I had to hear a definite answer.

“If you don’t want to think about it again, I have nothing to do here.”

“… What? Why?”

I replied as I turned my body to let him know that these were not empty words.

“For as long as you try to avoid pain, you can never get revenge.”

I took a few steps towards the door, but before I could reach the doorknob, he called me.

“Is there really a way? Can I get revenge?”

At the half-trembling voice, I slowly turned my head and saw a clenched fist.

“It’s just like what you heard over the phone. But even if there was a way, you couldn’t even start in your current state.”

“Why? What is the way?”

“You go back into that den.”

He held his breath as he stared at me. Thanks to his bloodless face, he looked less like a human and stayed like that for a long time before muttering.

“I… have to go back in there?”

“Yes. Hide your scars casually. But you can’t even think of it right now. So give up. Have revenge your way, or whatever.”

I added, looking at him.

“Just live like that.”

This time I grabbed the handle and turned it. But his words prevented me from going out again.

“… No. like this… I don’t want to live like this.”

It’s still a small voice, but I heard what I wanted.

“I want revenge. Fuck, all those bastards… I want to kill them.”

I hadn’t approached him yet, leaned against the door, and watched him indifferently from a distance. “I want to kill them ”, it’s not enough. Recognizing my intentions, he removed his hand from the window frame and straightened his uncomfortable body.

“You ask what happened? It’s just as you said. He said it was just a game, covered my eyes, and took me to a room. But…”

His voice began to tremble badly again, but he managed to speak.

“About five or six bastards stripped me and took turns fucking me. When I rebelled, they tied my hands behind my back and kicked me like a ball, causing me to pass out for a moment. Then something hot and painful touched my body and I opened my eyes… They stuck a big candle in my anus and lit it. Falling down in the middle in front of them… naked… with only my hips held high. What made me sick was the wax running between my legs. When they realized that I was awake, the jerks screamed and giggled. And do you know what they did? They were singing a happy birthday song. It was one of the bastard’s birthday. Isn’t it funny? They lit the candles because it was his birthday. haha… I am the birthday cake. Birthday cake. Fuck, isn’t that funny?”

A single tear trickled down his face as he smiled. But the voice came back rather calmly.

“There was an old man named Chairman Kim who was watching from one side of the room while I was being the urine and semen pot of those bastards. Giving orders in a muffled voice. Fuck the two of you together, let several people cum in your mouth at the same time. Bastards listened to what the old man said no matter what. But who do you think was sucking the dick hard between the old man’s legs? It was Song Yoohan. Only then did I realize that the reason Hyungseok kept coercing me and arranging a meeting with Song Yoohan was to offer me as a sacrifice. Hyungseok knew. What Song Yoohan is doing, what the old sponsor bastard wants.”

He stopped talking and looked around the room.

“This hospital, didn’t you think it was strange when you entered? You know what I was hospitalized for, but why am I in the internal medicine department?”

His gaze turned to the pillow with the name of the hospital on it.

“This is a place that cleans up messed up trash like me. Of course, I wasn’t the first person brought here, and the doctors and nurses didn’t blink an eye at my condition. My back was torn and all of my thighs were burned with wax. On the contrary, they were annoyed that it was difficult to remove hardened wax from my anus. I’ve been hospitalized for 3 weeks now. But I still have a hard time going to the bathroom. Those bastards didn’t touch my face because I was an actor, so my face is fine, but the rest is terrible. Then, as a reward, Song Yoohan told me to come find him when all is well. He said I will be added as an important supporting role in a cable TV drama.”

After his long speech, he took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a moment.

“For the past three weeks, no matter how hard I try to forget, the sound of those bitches’ laughter won’t go away from my ears. I keep hearing the Happy Birthday song they used to sing.”

He opened his eyes and asked me with a calm face.

“As you said, if there is a way to get revenge, I want to tear all of those fuckers apart and get rid of these images. But before that.”

He cut off his words coldly and looked at me suspiciously.

“Why are you trying to help me?”

“I never said I would help you.”

“What? But…”

“I’m just telling you how to get revenge.”

“Isn’t that helping?”

I smiled at him for the first time.

“Yes. I also have something to take revenge on Song Yoohan for. So I’m going to use you so that my revenge can succeed. So don’t get me wrong.”

I thought it couldn’t be helped if the other person got angry. But he just stared at me with a strange expression. And then, after a while, he brought up unexpected words.

“You are a very interesting person.”

“…”

“If you’re really using me, shouldn’t you not say that?”

“Then what should I do? Your situation is so bad that you want to help? Lying doesn’t end in one moment, it has to continue, so it’s a very tiring job. It’s enough for me to deceive just the guy I’m taking revenge on.”

He seemed to smile faintly for a moment, but then nodded his head.

“Yeah, that’s what’s funny. You look crooked, but you seem to draw a straight line underneath. It’s unexpected honesty.”

I frowned for a moment, then replied calmly.

“Fine. Since we’re talking about honesty, let me tell you one more thing. If you want to get the revenge I’m talking about, there’s something you have to be prepared for. There might be a situation where you have to give up your ass to those bastards again.”

“…”

“So if you don’t want to, quit now. Like the honesty you praised, I am only using you and have no intention of helping you.”

I thought his silence would be long, but he unexpectedly asked expressionlessly.

“So what am I supposed to do?”

This time, I couldn’t speak right away, so I looked at him and opened my mouth slowly.

“Accept Song Yoohan’s offer. And tell him you’re in on that thing too.”

Then he shook his head.

“I can put up with being tormented again, but I don’t want to bring in other people, trainees who don’t know anything about it.”

“You don’t have to. You just have to pretend.”

“I’ll get caught soon…”

“You won’t get caught. Song Yoohan will be filming abroad soon. So you only have a few days to deceive him right now. You don’t have to do anything with the excuse that you’re sick.”

According to what Alice’s boss said before, it was certain that Myungshin was going abroad. At least 3 or 4 days. It would be a week at the longest.

“Once you join the group, while Song Yoohan is gone, work hard to instigate that punk Hyungseok.”

“What?”

I raised one corner of my mouth to him.

“Song Yoohan must be letting Hyungseok go and collect the necessary victims. And he will always receive great rewards. Say this to Hyungseok. Isn’t it unfair that he does the most important thing? Shouldn’t he be the one sucking Chairman Kim’s dick? All the roles Song Yoohan plays should be his.”

“To make the two of them fight each other? But Hyungseok is afraid of Song Yoohan and won’t listen to me. Besides, even Song Yoohan can easily get rid of Hyungseok.”

When he shook his head, saying it was difficult, my smile twisted more.

“Then the way is even simpler. Make Hyungseok not afraid of Song Yoohan, and make Song Yoohan unable to touch Hyungseok.”

“How?” I answered the question briefly.

“That I’ll take care of, don’t worry.”

He seemed to want to know more, but he nodded and muttered that he knew.

“Okay, for now I… I’ll do what I have to do first.”

Then, as if something important came to mind, he raised his serious eyes.

“Then what about that geezer? I don’t think anyone can get revenge on Chairman Kim?”

“… He will be taken care of by someone else.”

“Who?”

He waited for an answer with a surprised look. But now I have only one thing to say.

“There is. Someone who’s crazy.”